TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
FROM: MANAGEMENT
In order to assure the highest level of quality work and productivity
from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well-trained
through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.) We
are trying to give employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else.
If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the job,
please see your manager. You will be immediately placed at the top of
the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled at seeing
that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in the
Departmental EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAM (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.) Those who
fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE
ATTITUDE TRAINING
(E.A.TS.H.I.T.) Since our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were
promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are full of
S.H.I.T. already.
If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in job training
others.
We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.)
Those who are full of B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T., will get S.H.I.T. jobs and can
apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF INTENSITY PROGRAMMING
(D.I.P.S.H.I.T.)
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF
TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.)
Thank You,
BOSS IN GENERAL,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)
FROM: MANAGEMENT
In order to assure the highest level of quality work and productivity
from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well-trained
through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.) We
are trying to give employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else.
If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the job,
please see your manager. You will be immediately placed at the top of
the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled at seeing
that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in the
Departmental EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAM (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.) Those who
fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE
ATTITUDE TRAINING
(E.A.TS.H.I.T.) Since our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were
promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are full of
S.H.I.T. already.
If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in job training
others.
We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.)
Those who are full of B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T., will get S.H.I.T. jobs and can
apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF INTENSITY PROGRAMMING
(D.I.P.S.H.I.T.)
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF
TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.)
Thank You,
BOSS IN GENERAL,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)
